Sexuality
is one of the fundamental components of our relationships, our communications,
love justice for all, and even, for portraying our true personalities. Every
human being is sexual with a raw energy within us. It gives us power to perform
different activities depending on how we process it. Our lives have a
generative or productive aspect. The greatest concern could be how productive
am I? Possibly, some people tend toward positive effectiveness. On the other
hand, some of us decide to be productive but in a negative sense. We ought to
acknowledge that being negative in our productivity is a sign that our praxis
has loopholes. In this sense we have not processed our raw energy rightly and
so not sexually integrated. However, one who is sexually integrated acts toward
positive productivity.
As
human beings we have two sexuality stages. These include the primary and
secondary stages. The primary stage deals with gender; thus, we
acknowledge that God created us as either man or woman. The secondary stage
takes into the genitalia or our sexual organs. Most of us tend to dwell on the
secondary stage in all our relationships. We must know that our sexuality is
broad but not just limited to the genitalia as the youth tend to believe. If we
can understand the importance of sexuality then we shall always to be free and
open up to talk about what is going on in our sexual life. This is also another
characteristic of being sexually integrated. To be sexually integrated simply
means that an individual is able to accept acknowledge one’s gender, sexual
orientation and appreciate himself or herself. This means that one is in
position to realise that he/ she is human and a sexual being and above all who
ought to act with personal and integrated responsibility.
The climax of sexual
integration is intimacy; an aspect where we relate with people of all genders
not only in a more ‘solid’ way but with boundaries. At times, people who are
meant to be committed to different vocations tend to ‘double deal’. This
is a sign of lack of sexual integration. In facts living uncommitted life not
only hurts us but also the people we engage with.
We can imitate the example of Jesus who was
perfectly integrated. This is clear when he related with all kinds of people
including the females such as Martha and Mary. For all His life-time, Jesus was
never accused of any sex scandal. He chose an operational mode that would lead
him to fulfil God’s will. All his raw energy was put to use for service. We
must know that we pick our own operational only when we are fully integrated.
One of the ways that can help us to understand our sexuality is taking a sexual
history. At the end, the sexual history will not only benefit us but our
community members. This is because we shall be in position of accepting
ourselves and not condemning other by their sexual orientations but treating
each other as brothers and sisters.
Simon Peter Kahinda